Guy Dragonslayer woke the fuck up on the ground. "Motherfucker, I need to stop drinking so god damn much weed", Guy thought to himself straining in very unnatural ways his neck to look up at the open window. The sun was bright as shit and Guy just fucking couldn't comprehend why the shit it was open to light. He never opens the window, all his shitting/rolling on the floor is done in complete darkness and in the various corners and small spaces of the log cabin he had become trapped in. Trapped in because he forgot he could open a fucking window like a human being and not some sort of animal man permanently handicapped by grievous head wounds that require copious amounts of weed to manage the pain. The emotional pain of being sexually wrecked by a dragon. But he got laid. And his head caved in by a dragon being raped, in a head caving way that only a dragon being sexually assaulted can. But he got laid so doesn't matter. So yeah anyways he was looking right the fuck up at the top of the bathroom ceiling he had been sleeping in, just covered in all his filth and weed cans, at this tiny crumpled man in a green cap looking down at him. He was smiling like some kind of smiler. His leathery old face puffed in and out with heavy breathes almost like he was running. To or from what, Guy didn't know. But Guy had a good idea why. Then old mexican asked if Guy could open the window for him really quick and let him inside. "Fuck you dude let me out first", Guy said back smoothly like the way Mr. Bean always imagined he'd say shit but never did in the movies. Guy then…
OR
No comments:
Post a Comment